Of course!

I'd like to think the problems lie within the title's emphasis on spreadsheet gameplay (more on that in a second), repetitive music, and a learning curve tracing an 87 degree slope, and not within the inadequacies of my creative abilities-but what do I know?!

/sigh

Here, let me do the review thing, and you can decide who or what's to blame.

Upon arriving at the "Nodiatis" website, we're all treated with the image of a scantily clad woman chained to a pillar. For better or for worse, this little lass may have helped instill unrealistic expectations the gameplay just couldn't meet. The same goes for the character creation process.

After choosing my character portrait from a predetermined list, a wall of 26 possible classes flooded my webpage. When was the last time an MMO featured more classes than the cumulative number of a normal person's fingers and toes? I can't remember.

Besides the usual Warrior, Druid, and Ranger roles we've all seen in every MMO with an emphasis on gathering phat loot, players can opt to become one of the alternatives, including Traders, Regeners, Angels and Alcoholics. Traders receive a bonus reduction to tax on player to player transactions, Regeners regenerate their health and mana faster than other classes, Angels receive a bonus to their white magic effects, and Alcoholics can gain up to a 99% "chance to be buzzed instead of dazed or feared." Guess which one I picked.

Completely new to the game, I decided to walk jump through the tutorial hoops, one of which scared the bejeesus out of me:

"You have initiated the mandatory 30 second gem tutorial by purchasing a gem. Read every word or you will cry later. In order for you to use a gem you must draw it at random from your gem pouch when you are in combat. So step #1 is to put your gem in your pouch. Open your pouch by clicking the 'Open Gem Pouch' Icon."

I read every word, and thankfully I didn't cry later, but a precedent had no doubt been set. The other tutorials following this one didn't threaten me, but they very well could've. There's a lot to learn concerning the title's skills system, crushingly so. In fact, I once saw it swallow an NPC whole (not a true story).

14 possible skill categories line the left side of the Skills window, and each include from five to seven additional subcategories, with more unlocking at level 20. The learning category allows users to apply passive training to a particular sub-skill which allows incremental amounts of experience automatically to go towards whatever was assigned, even when logged out. Other categories like Protection, Artistry, and Adventuring require Active advancement, meaning any experience gained in that category will apply to a particular sub skill. This leveling system affords users an extraordinary level of customization over their particular hero, but at the expense of crushing the will to play of everyone but the most ambitious (or reviewers).

Following each battle featuring the same battle music (I still hear it in my sleep…), players can sell their collected trophies for cash at a store, drop them into shrines which will grant additional xp in the category indicated, or redeem them for quests. What this means is that players need to spend a lot of time engaging in random encounters with enemies for their loot, or in some cases, to kill a particular enemy for a "kill quest." This wouldn't be a problem if the combat wasn't so mind-numbingly boring.

The turn-based battles feature very little animation. The enemies and backgrounds remain still, while your character swings his/her/its weapon in a circular motion at the opponent. The action's swift out-of-nowhere cheesey motion still makes me laugh.

Keeping the fights from being an auto-attack initiate-and-forget mess is the game's spell system, which is probably best compared to a trading card game. Prior to battle, gems can be placed in the gem pouch, which are then randomly pulled during fights with NPCs. Pulling from an empty slot results in a an escape gem, which can be used to escape from battle. The system's not particularly bad, or even poorly implemented, it's mostly just really boring. In fact, that's my main complaint with the entire game.

The spells and sorcery medieval-ish setting has been utilized hundreds of times, there's no physical representations of my character other than a floating head who flails various weapons at rats and drunken fisherman (the game's first boss), and the battle system is has a birdbath level of depth. Yes, I enjoy the skill system, but I'm also the type of guy who has an unnatural affinity for Microsoft Excel. Those who don't share the same excitement over spreadsheets, and (apparently) anyone without an imagination, should probably find a better way to kill some time.

Review Kyle Stallock
October 10, 2009